5:45 a.m. Alarm goes off, but it’s Saturday, I stayed up a little too late, so I doze a little longer.
6:15ish I roll out of bed & get read for my workout & prepping the kitchen for the countertop man.
7:10 Hubs takes daughter to work, since I’m still working out.
8:19 a.m. Update the Granite Guy’s contact information in my phone with “countertop” at the end of his last name & his company name & address. Seems simple, but this is one of the best tips Brent Daniels ever gave me. When I add “Buyer,” “Seller,” “Lender,” at the end of the person’s name, it jogs my memory & allows me to have a much more personal conversation with the person calling me & makes them feel respected & valuable to me, because they are. It has been an immense blessing in staying organized.
What are the big rocks for the day? I still need to do my morning Creation Sequence.
8:30 a.m. Granite man shows up. Do my creation sequence quietly in the office while staying available. Having the Trello list of those cards on my phone’s home screen has been a Godsend. Thank you Son 1! And thank you Abagail & Emmylee for your “Trello for Business” course. 🙂

• Catch up on any responses I didn’t get to yesterday afternoon.
• Make sure I’m caught up on the next step for each of the Opportunities in the pipeline.
• Spend time doing some of the thinking work for “Creating Your Best Life.”
• How will I spend quality time with the family today?
• How will I make today restful & rejuvenating?

8:52 a.m. Dude, what? Two weeks from template making to kitchen install – as in no kitchen sink for two more weeks! First world problems, right? Back to the creation sequence.

One of the most rejuvenating, restful and energizing things to me is to give myself the freedom and permission to be creative, to think of new ideas, to work on strategic planning. I am going to allow myself some time to do those things today.
11:21 a.m. Said goodbye to Granite Man, tried unsuccessfully to rig a temporary sink idea, caught up on my CRM Inbox & FB messages, said goodbye to a property I would have loved to flip but can’t get to the right price.
2 p.m. First son brought in the mail, and I received a wonderful surprise from a new friend in Texas. I encouraged her and gave her some guidance toward her first deal, and she showed her appreciation by sending me a sweet thank you card, a fall decoration, and some money for Hubs and me to go out for a fall latte date! 😀
7:33 p.m. Yay, hit all the big rocks! 🙂 Spent the early afternoon weeding the garden and being thankful all over again for the fun bounty that God provided with hardly any of our own labor this year. They were the seeds that kept on giving. Got to spend time with the family around the bonfire of our burning old nasty kitchen cabinets. The potatoes were a little “charred,” but there were still some edible bits, and the brats and hot dogs cooked just enough before the rain hit.
Spent the rest of the evening putting supplies away into the new upper cabinets and pantries and spending time relaxing with the family.

Some unknown hour: awake in the dark, mind abuzz with activity. Still working on realizing the fruition of, “He gives His beloved rest.”
7:15 Drive daughter to work.
7:50 Creation sequence in whisper mode, willing myself forward.
8:30 a.m. Spend a few minutes thinking about what to put in my “Best Life” bookmarks folder on my browser. My “why,” I need some of my why in there, especially for days like today. I look up and bookmark the Global Conflict Tracker and two of my favorite non-profits that directly serve areas of violent conflict. Just spending a few minutes there gets my engines firing, and I suddenly, for the first time yet today, feel like I have energy to face the day.
9:16 a.m. Wait! What’s that sound I hear? Son’s at university until 2, no construction guys are banging around on the wall opposite me, no dogs are scratching and acting like Thumper, no phones ringing. It’s the beautiful, amazing, coveted sound of . . . . silence.
Yes, yes, yes I realize that one day I will hear silence continually and truly miss all the commotion, but that is not my now. Now, today, the silence brings a feeling of deep rest to my soul, and I need that so badly today when my brain decided to wake me up in the dark and start working without my permission again…
9:20 a.m. I’ve checked my email, my FB messages, and forwarded on the night’s leads to my Acq Director; now, I’m going to rally my brain to sort out the day’s work. Just like with the money, I need to tell my time where to go, to give each hour a job. At least a half of one will be for rest at some point today.
9:32 a.m. Determined to make this day productive and to take advantage of the magical quiet.
9:47 a.m. To the CRM. Scratch that.
First, I’m going to shove down my fear and pride and ask in the subto community who would be interested in funding my first flip. Then, I’m going to work on my deal analyzer using Pace’s Flip Calculator first. If I don’t do it now, everything else will take over the day, and I’ll never get to it. I’ll burrow down into those two most likely leads from my new agent contact and let my Acq Director (AD) follow up on the night’s leads. I’ll work on dispositions (“disp” – selling contracts) and follow-up later in the afternoon, amidst the family hubbub.
10:16 Little sideline there trying to log in and then attending to a question from AD. Let’s go for it again.

As you can see, the day all kind of blended together for me after that. More comping, phone calls with Acq Director, sellers, buyers. I had woken up dizzy & with a headache, so I was a little off my game. Took a quick break at noon to grab an open-faced egg sandwich with my husband. Had some interaction with son & daughter in the afternoon.
I had finished my careful comparison of the agent leads for my first flip. Most proved to predict a ridiculous loss, so I asked him for more accurate sales comps. He tried to give me a general bucket of all sales for the year in that town, and I kindly responded that the report wouldn’t cut it. He promised to get back at it more specifically on Monday. I think I’ll be asking local wholesalers for properties in the meantime.
Had a conversation with my AD about how I can respect her need to be part-time. We’re going to do our best to keep our communications between 9 a.m. and 2 p.m., and everything else will go as notes and tasks in the CRM. If it’s something that elicits a more timely response, I will pick it back up. This is something that has gotten a little confusing – trying to have multiple people communicate with any particular person; however, it’s just where my business is at right now, so I’m going to have to do my best until we get over this ugly duckling hump of my current capacity.
5:55 p.m. Take a call from a novice buyer from last year on a wholesale purchase “subject to” that went sideways. Listen. Care. He’s going through a hard time. Reach back out to the seller and ask for understanding and release of his earnest money funds still sitting at title. Fingers crossed.
Around 6 p.m. Family went out to eat, since we’re still without a functioning kitchen and groceries are somewhat lacking. I decided to stay home and eat a quiet meal of butternut squash from the garden and homemade Indian chai (delicious & perfect for a fall-turning day), while I caught up on my Flip Me tutorials I didn’t realize I was far behind on. This section was about corporate structure and intelligent tax planning – gets me excited. 🙂
7 p.m. Start cleaning & putting away some kitchen items into the finished upper cabinets while simultaneously watching my Flip Me classes.
8 p.m. Hubs hadn’t been feeling up to par and started studying for his Aquinas exam early. I joined him now for a little relaxation on our favorite farm show – now, sadly, at its end.
10:30 p.m. Deut. 28:1-13 I got thinking about Bill Walton’s testimony at some point today (how at 90 days of meditating on and speaking that portion of Scripture, he received his first big business opportunity) and decided, just for fun, to count out 90 days from the day I started. No joke, guess what day it falls on?! Christmas Day! I can hardly wait to see what opportunity comes across my path around that time for me to put my hand to as God empowers me to prosper in every aspect of life.
He’s a good, good Father! I’ve had days I felt like an orphan, but every time I stop to think about what a good Father God’s been to me, since my own was tragically killed, I get so full of love, joy, and thankfulness I feel like I’m going to explode!

5 a.m. Lie awake sorting through the upcoming day.
5:45 a.m. Alarm goes off, and & actually get up today – Yay!
6 a.m. Tidy up, so I can have room to workout.
6:15 a.m. Athlean XX – back & arms today.
7: a.m. Creation Sequence
7:10 Hubs takes daughter to work today while I drink my protein drink & heat water for coffee on our makeshift coffee bar – my office desk (which happens to be an Ikea table anyway – Have I mentioned how much I miss desk drawers to put things away & keep everything tidy?). Finish tidying – dishes to the bathtub (temporary sink) and all that good stuff.
7:50ish Kiss Hubs goodbye as he heads off to his 8-5. Plan for some fried chicken together at noon today – before they run out. We need to snatch some restful joy and celebration in the midst of all this exhausting beehive of activity in our house.
8:30 a.m. Start checking messages from overnight.
9:01 a.m. Guys show for Day 2 of kitchen install. It’s going to be another loud but productive day. Need to remember to reach out to my hedge fund guy who’s back in town from Greece & see if he wants to move on the commodities deals. Also need to remember to get my Covington guy on the dialer today. What’s the other big thing….? Oh yeah, we should decide no-go on the Covington flip likely and see if my local guy is open to teaming up with me on the first one. Make a decision on the two decent Versailles leads from the agent yesterday.

9:05 a.m. Show the kitchen man where the studs are 😀
9:13 a.m. Check email.
9:20 a.m. Oh goody, one of my favorite things (NOT!)… I get to prep new data to import a call list for my Covington guy… Why are only 24 out of nearly 4,000 contacts importing into the campaign? BatchDialer was on it. Problem solved 🙂
9:45 a.m. Back to checking messages now – into my CRM & Slack. Comping & drilling/sawing, do NOT go hand-in-hand! Have I mentioned how much I do NOT enjoy comping anyway, especially on agent & rural leads?
10 a.m. Phew, it’s a beast taking wholesaler calls with a saw going in the background! Okay, helping son with his university essay for a few.
… He didn’t like my answers… Oh boy, back to RE.
10:19 a.m. Responding to messages, new leads, & checking in with Acq Director
11:30 Stop for a quick bite with Hubs.
12: p.m. Say goodbye to the kitchen guys for another day. Matt the cabinet guy tells me I made a really wise decision having them put in the cabinet handles, because it’s very difficult, if not impossible, to get them to look good, straight, and not damage the cabinets in the process, without the template they have. They’ll be coming back to do that early next week when the other team returns with the template. Realize we might be going the rest of the week & weekend without a functioning kitchen, as the Granite Guys are sticking with their original appointment date and Saturday is just for measuring, not for install…
12:15 Hubs picks daughter up from work, so I can try to make it to my commodities follow ups at some point today, after I’m caught up on RE.
First stop, call back dispo wholesaler. Next, call back Acq Director. Then, back to lead follow-up.
2:30 p.m. Head-on-arms-at-desk 5ish minute nap, so I can try to focus better.
2:43 p.m. How on earth to focus with one son telling you about cadavers accepting swine kidneys, a daughter asking you how to cook pasta in a non-kitchen kitchen, and the other son’s deep raspy voice arguing the MLA citation rules for his uni paper with you?! Ah, it just keeps going!
2:55 p.m. Wow, this is where I stopped logging. What happened for the rest of the day/night? Super hard time focusing, lots of getting pulled away to help with papers, first son came home to say Hi & share interesting things he’s been learning & some of his favorite Babylon Bee posts.
Working as able throughout, take a minute to love on my son & show him the kitchen progress before he heads off to a meeting.
Work some more. The ever amazing husband puts some chicken in the Instant Pot. What happened to the days when I did all the cooking, from scratch, baking natural sourdough bread from freshly ground wheat & all?! Fond memories.
Take a call from a flipper/wholesaler friend, talk about his current deal, and get a positive response when I ask if I can shadow him on one of his local flips to learn the process.
6:30ish Take a call back from another local flipper/wholesaler guiding me on how to keep myself out of hot water when funding a flip.
Supper with the fam around 7. Tell daughter how much we miss seeing her now that she’s working every morning, six days a week & loves to be quiet in her room for the rest of every day until she’s too tired to talk at supper. We’re still working to figure out the balance of working around each other’s schedules, so we still have time for each other before the other person is wiped out for the day. At least we’re communicating, just not always in the productive way. It’s a work in progress.
Laugh a little with Hubs as we watch the expensive mishaps of a British TV personality trying his hand at farming his massive estate. Crash hard – at least for the first half of the night. No idea what time we turned off the lights.

5:45 a.m. Alarm goes off.
6 a.m. Drag my hiney out of bed & finish prepping the kitchen. Find out from Hubs where stuff needs to go while simultaneously but inadvertently making him really cranky.
7:15 Bring daughter to work. Kiss and make up with Hubs.
7:35 Keep working on kitchen.
9:15 a.m. Do a mini “Creation Sequence” while I’ve got a few minutes alone.
9:35 Sit down to work while the cabinet guys start.
9:48 Respond to cry, “Ma’am where’s your water shut-off?! The pipe just broke.”… Ask my Acq Director to cover down for me.
10 Back to work, responding to messages that came in overnight.
10:40 Address a couple things for the kitchen.
10:52 Back to work responding to messages. Try to hold my potty break as long as possible, so I don’t have to take time out to go to the corner gas station.
11 a.m. Listen to Pace Morby make seller calls for Flip Me in the background while responding to messages.
11:02 a.m. Man, I can’t hold it anymore! Down to the gas station I go.
11:11 a.m. Wow, it feels so great to have clean hands again after working with that dusty ductwork securing that floor board earlier! Spent a few minutes on the walk back being so very grateful for how easy it usually is to get clean water here. I was transported back in time to when we returned from Tanzania, Haiti, and Nigeria to the USA. It’s that same feeling of when you first take a shower where you don’t have to keep your lips sealed shut or where you can brush your teeth from the tap, or where you don’t have to transport all your drinking water from a water store via motorcycle.

I am so 100% thankful for all the time, love, tears, blood, sweat, and money our forefathers put into founding this nation and creating this infrastructure that we’re still using today! Thank you, Lord, for giving them that desire and fortitude to see it through when times were beyond difficult.

11:15 a.m. Okay, back to work. Checking for messages that need responses & begin some more outreach looking for deals. Need to find two more pronto for a current buyer. Update another buyer’s buy box info in CRM.
11:53 a.m. Admire Day 1 Kitchen work, celebrate that we got the pipe fixed with no major hiccups (Yay, for painful past experience that prepares us for the present!), last minute messages check, prep to take guest to his next stay, & pick up daughter from work. Let the guys know they accidentally took our torque drill.

1:18 Back at desk checking in with Acq Director after welcoming in the sheetrock guy & helping Hubs get restarted on plumbing & grabbing a super quick toast & surprise Gluten-Free Miracles cinnamon roll Hubs brought home for me after his fingerprinting appointment for his real estate exam (hoping it’s one of their sugar-free, grain-free treats – which also makes it guilt-free, but it was very nicely textured and awfully tasty, so…..). YOLO, right? 😀

Internet is down, so I’m hoping my phone has hotspot… Wish Hubs wasn’t busy, because it doesn’t seem to be working, and I have no idea what I’m doing… Still not working. Okay, working from my phone it is…
2:02 p.m. Pipes are connected. Hubs worked his magic. Internet is back up. 🙂 Yay for techy husbands! Back to checking for messages (FB, email, text, and CRM – not necessarily in that order) that came in while I was out of commission & looking for deals.
2:11 p.m. Trying to comp properties from an agent lead while a grinder/saw is going on the other side of my office wall is like…..trying to do calculus while someone is running their fingernails down the chalkboard over-and-over-and-over again.

2:45 p.m. Quick cat nap with Marshmallow on the office loveseat to recover from my sickening carb crash (amidst the sawing and banging. I guess it wasn’t a sugar-free, grain-free cinnamon roll after all, or maybe it was the comping endlessly over-priced “leads” that did it to me…).

3:11 p.m. Back at it after instructing son #2 on how to drop off a financial aid payment for our missionary friend’s son to the local Christian university. I love our town!
3:40 p.m. Try unsuccessfully to help Hubs locate his other missing power drill now…

3:48 p.m. Agent sent more potential flips. Check to see if any are good leads.
3:55 p.m. Drill magically reappeared…
Where did the night go?! Continued working on comps & new leads until about 6 p.m.
Tried unsuccessfully to plan supper again. Corner store sold out of fried chicken – how could they?! Mr. Fitch sold out of roast chickens at the local IGA – I’m happy for him. He’s the backbone of this town.
6ish p.m. Friends who didn’t show in time to help last night suddenly appeared to catch up on the crypto business – fun, but difficult timing, as my insides were shriveling, we had no kitchen to offer them food, and I needed to buy supplies for the guys to work in the kitchen the next day – before Lowes closed… Thank God for raw milk and Vital Protein collagen peptides from Costco. 😀
My daughter had pointed out that the idea to go without knobs on the cupboards was a little flawed. Since they are soft-close, they are difficult to open, especially one-handed without a handle. Off to Lowes – especially since hardware install is included in the bid! Why would I create myself stress later trying to get them all perfectly centered and level, when I could have some experts I already paid do it?! How did I choose the handles? Well, okay… we all like matte black, it’s “in” and is fairly non-descript (might still look good in 20 years), so which of these matte black don’t feel like plastic, are tolerable looking, and actually have almost 50 in stock? Ah, okay, that one it is then. Yes, that was the way. Praise God it was a handle I actually didn’t mind the look of – it was kind of nice looking even.
8:10 p.m. Arrive home & say goodbye to the guys.
9 p.m. Impromptu little chuck steak and eggs by Hubs. He’s the best!
9:30 p.m. Drag myself to bed, watch one farming show on the laptop, read my Deut. 28:1-13 and crash hard.

 

October 19, 2021 – Determine to find and close on (within 30 days) a property to flip for a healthy profit ($30,000+).
Day 1:

5:45 a.m. Alarm goes off. Takes me a few minutes to wake up. Time of month has me in some discomfort but determine to at least take a walk, even though it’s cold and dark outside.
7 a.m. Shower and get ready for the day while listening to Mindset Fix music, drop my son off at uni and listen to latest Brent Daniels episode on the way home & while finishing getting ready, greet our visitor and get him set up for the day. The episode helps me clear my mindset & decide to put my experience out there to help others.
7:30 a.m. Start and flip over some laundry. Son forgot to make sure his pants are dry for school today.
8 a.m. Finish my “Creation Sequence” from Bill Walton’s book, Creating Your Best Life: Discover Your God-Given Potential.
8:58 a.m. At the PC prepping to be responsive to anything that’s come in since last night and preparing for new outreach. Today, I’ll conquer my fear of working with agents.

Checking and responding to deal text messages first (closest to the money). First one to address is one that we know is locked up a little high, but the seller really likes and trusts me and wants to work with me. Teaming up with a subto member on this one, and he’s marketing for a buyer willing to pay a little more. Feedback so far is just what we thought, “Price a little high. Big job (large square footage if including basement). Calling seller to update her, as she requested, even though I don’t feel like it.

Call went well. Made sure to ask how her medical procedure went yesterday.

Moving on to checking my CRM for follow-up needed. Current leads needing attention:

1. Wholesaler (Jamil & Pace) – FB: Does he have the purchase agreement yet?
2. DTS (D4$) – MK: I need to find her, so we can reopen the conversation about her house.
3. DTS (Local Squad Up)- SV: Has the buyer deposited his earnest $?
4. Wholesaler (Jamil & Pace) – AC:  Does he have the purchase agreement yet?
5. Contractor (Local Squad Up) – KH: Do we need to let this 1st property go & move onto the next one? Try again to get the County Code Violations officer on the phone & ask his opinion.
6. Commodities (Subto, KeyGlee) – Call everyone again who didn’t respond yesterday. Keep moving everything one step forward. Communicate with RS and encourage him.
7. DTS (PPL) – CD: Keep feeding back with her as buyers go into see the property.
8. Wholesaler (TTP)- Call buyer & see what we can do about the liens to bring this property to closing.
9. Wholesaler (KeyGlee) – MS: Is the seller willing to price drop or do terms?

Nothing urgent, so let’s spend 9:30-10 going one-by-one through some of the New Contact Outreach and see what we have. [Punctuated with caring for the guest and the dog.]

10:03 Check in with myself. That felt painfully slow. Only contacted 4 people once I went through vetting the leads to make sure they were actually New Contacts and not duplicates, finding out a little of the context of the lead, etc. Let’s do it for another half hour and see if we can do any better.
10:51 Too many distractions with the boys. Taking a break to check FB Messenger for leads.
11:02 Send subto contracts to subto student in NKY to prep for working together on a lead he’s closing.
11:04 Boys gone to eat. Hammer out a few more outreaches. Check-ins with my Acq Director simultaneously.
11:16 Follow up on Winchester lead. Will need to be under $175k. Need to look into zoning. An 8 bed/8 bath went for $285k recently…
11:30 Quick food/coffee break with husband. Another day in the battle against the mice.
11:56 Bust out a few more. Boys just burst in… Life of a Mom-preneur 🙂
12:10 Buyer call. Lob two simultaneous calls to Acq Director.
12:15 Pick up daughter from work.
12:54 Check in with Acq Director & boys. Back at desk. Check for messages/responses.
1 p.m. Call back from local agent to find 1st flip.
1:20 p.m. House full of kids. Office full of boys playing video games. Time to check in on FB groups & add value where I can.
1:48 p.m. Call with wholesaler to assist in his 1st subto contracts.
2 Get son 1 to take son 2 to ortho
2:15 p.m. Talk about a possible flip partnership with Subto Wholesaler/Agent BS.
2:39 Back onto follow up texts in CRM.
3:15 Call with Acq Director
4:05 Sort out earnest $ question with buyer & title. Try unsuccessfully to plan supper with the fam…
4:07 Answer Slack message about a land deal that’s 24 hrs old, but I’m just now seeing.
4:11 Comp the HUD property lead. See if it would make a good 1st flip. https://www.zillow.com/homes/45-Grand-View-Ave,-Fort-Thomas-KY-41075_rb/1371818_zpid/
4:30 Get some advice from more experienced peers about if it’s stupid to do my first flip virtual if I’m teaming up with some friends already in place…

What happened to the rest of the night?! Oh yeah, trying to plan supper for the fam & guest with no kitchen, and then, got the call from the cabinet guys that they’re coming tomorrow, instead of Thursday, so we had to speed up our prep work…
6:30 p.m. Try unsuccessfully to get ahold of a friend to help us prep the kitchen for tomorrow a.m.
9 p.m. Go for an Earl Grey to try to eek out some more energy to finish mudding the kitchen.
10:02 p.m. Drag my way to my phone knowing it must be 2 a.m., as I can hardly stand up anymore I’m so tired. Check the time in shock. 😀 Wow, my stamina doesn’t seem to be what it used to at 20! Go watch a British farming show with my Hubs to relax a little before bed.
10:45 p.m. Hubs goes to say goodnight to the kiddos while I read my Deut. 28:1-13.
11 p.m. Had so much fun laughing as we finish up the farming show that I feel a lot better than I did the hour before but know I still should go to bed.

2017 – UPW, Rule 1
February 2018 – File my first LLC with the Secretary of State, pursue first business idea.
Christmas 2018 – Return to USA from Nigeria, sick and half-dead

2019 – Regain strength, join local, very affordable, very uplifting gym (Work on soul & body health.)

January 2019 – Find the right church family for us and dive right in to serving and getting to know the staff.

May 2019 – Graduate from MA Intercultural Studies program.

Summer 2019 – Hear about wholesaling real estate.
Fall 2019 – Start listening to Wholesaling Inc.

September 2019 – Try wholesaling on my own for 30 days

October 2019 – Realize I won’t make it far fast enough without a coach. Get my first credit card ever (0% interest for 15 months) and pay for coaching with Brent Daniels.

December 2019 – Close my first deal.
. . . . Close some more deals, get some more coaching (add details later)…
October 2020 – Buy a KeyGlee franchise.
October 2021 – Pay for Flip Me coaching.

So, we got the call a week ago that Mom has three months to live. What started in 2010 as a battle with liver cancer, through no drinking, hepatitis or known cause, has culminated into metastasis in the coccyx and a sacral “lesion.” I thought it might be helpful to some to document these last three months.

A couple days ago, my husband and the kids came with me to say goodbye (in case they’re not here in time when the end arrives) and to drop me off to spend these last three months with Mom. I have a baby business (not profiting in babies! but just started a year ago), so it was a major concern – how to keep it spiraling into massive debt while taking care of Mom? This is my journey.

A few days ago I told her oldest & dearest friends the news. Then, I reached out to my tight-knit business community and asked their advice on how to work in short spurts of time, in between caring for her and spending time with her. They came up with great thoughts, most of them centering on learning to delegate to those who love you & understand the business & also spending as much time as possible with mom, checking in on the delegates periodically to see how things are going.

Yesterday, hospice came, and we had the tough conversations: putting a will in place, planning for memorial or no, virtual or otherwise (given COVID), planning for cremation (whether direct – cheaper – or through a funeral home), whether to bury or no (since they weren’t raised in this community, and none of us live near each other), etc. New Jersey has apparently also legalized an aid-in-dying law, so even a conversation about what to do when pain becomes unbearable. Phew, it was a lot, but getting it out on the table was so much better than wondering in quiet whispers out of earshot of the central figure involved!

Today, we’re building a simple spreadsheet to help her husband know how to pay all the bills – process for paying, all the pertinent user names, passwords, security questions, account numbers, due dates, associated emails & their passwords, associated phone number for  authentication, etc. Again, it’s a LOT and punctuated by many bathroom breaks, letting the pets in & out, regulating her meds – pain & otherwise, getting her to eat & drink, helping her through the medicated brain fog to accomplish simple things like logging into her email. It’s only 10:53, and I’m already exhausted.

I got up at 5 a.m. feeling very refreshed and happy, since I normally only sleep until 4ish these days. It was so nice to sleep in. I used those first three hours of the day to organize the list of people who had acknowledged the difficulty of the situation and offered to pitch in. I am starting to see that reaching out to them and planning how we can all work together will be a big part of my work these days. The tasks I used to do in the business every day will best be, at least temporarily, handled by friends who have offered their loving help. One new business friend even gave $50 for us to have a nice meal together, though of course, it will be take-in since Mom can’t get out of bed for long at a time.

Well, I hear her struggling. She’s calling for Part 2 of the bill saga. I’ll be back.

 

Haha, made you look! No, but seriously, have you ever taken a big emotional risk & confided in someone in a moment of pain & suffering, and their reaction was basically, “Squirrel!?”

That sucks! This happened to me again recently, and to compound it, I’m a Creative (reference to the 5 Voices). Creatives tend to be extremely hesitant to open up to people if they’ve been repeatedly misundertood, and who hasn’t? I also tend to introversion (though my husband would debate that). So, yeah, I was taking a big risk, and I knew it.

Unfortunately, what I was concerned might happen, did – squirrel! I shared an pared-down version of my struggle, hoping they’d yield some helpful, tailored insight (keep that cookie cutter 3-steps-to-success mumbo jumbo for someone else, thank you very much). The struggle I shared was so deeply frustrating that I was willing to take a calculated risk and share anyway, in hopes that I would be wrong, and this person would really listen deeply, care, affirm the struggle, and possibly help me identify one very tangible tweak that could move me even one step in the right direction, but … Squirrel!

This sounds super depressing, and self-centered, but I share it in hopes that for anyone else who comes across this, maybe years down the road (since I never make a concerted effort to make this blog a go), you will know you’re not alone. Nobody likes to hear someone talk about themselves all the time, but who do we know better than ourselves, right? So if I can, in any way, encourage you just a little by doing a scary thing and opening my life to you, and letting you know you’re not alone, then here goes – whether you squirrel on me or not.

 

What did I do about it? How did I handle the pain and move another step forward?

1. I didn’t give up, even though I VERY badly wanted to (That would be a whole post in itself).
2. I took the time to really think about the factors that were contributing to my feeling of overwhelm, identified them, wrote them down, and then thought concretely about one or two of them and decisions that needed to be made.
3. When someone very close to me came for a visit, I took time and listened to them. I asked them about what’s going on in their life & truly listened and cared. When the opportunity came, and because I knew we have a similar personality make-up and they get me, I just shared a very brief fly-over of what I thought could be the root of the problem I was dealing with.

   Guess what happened? They listened. They got it.

   They didn’t swing to one way or the other making assumptions about me, because they know me. They didn’t act too busy or business-y. They actually understood the struggle, and then, beautiful thing. They shared some very insightful tidbits from their own journey.

   Together, we hashed out a bird’s eye view of where I could be in the journey, confirmed that, Yes, it’s hard right now, but if I don’t quit, there’s hope on the horizon! There’s a future in sight!

4. I slept on it and asked God for guidance, strength, and help.
5. Those couple concrete things I mentioned that needed decisions, I did the hard thing and communicated as clearly and kindly as I was able to a person involved and let them know, Change is on the horizon, and if you’d like to move with it, here’s what needs to happen (For anyone who doesn’t know me, this is not about my marriage. It had to do with some difficult business decisions).
6. Since it’s not about what you know but who you know, I reached out to a couple people more experienced than I and asked a concise question that went straight to the heart of one of those concrete issues. I am taking their input to heart and will make changes, knowing that their experience has taught them the answer to one of the things that was holding me in a gridlock of unnecessary struggle, stress, and even fear.
7. I got out of bed the next day and exercised, sang, and danced when I didn’t feel like it. I sang & danced until my mind felt right again, until it came into submission to my regenerated spirit that knows the truth (Again, could be another blog post in & of itself).

These steps may not be the exact same for you & your situation, but it is a great place to start! They have worked for me over & over again. Sometimes you don’t get it right the first time (i.e. choosing the wrong person to bounce things off of), and the road gets even muddier, but just don’t give up! Go through the painful process with a heart of humility & thoughtfulness, and the answer will show itself, even if over time and with more struggle than you’d like. You may not want to hear it now, but you will come out stronger & more equipped to help others. Love to you today!